It is my great pleasure to welcome my fellow author and SpellBound Book stable mate, Tracy Stewart, to the blog to discuss why she writes. It makes fascinating reading. Thank you for taking time to tell my readers about your writing today Tracy.
Thank you for inviting me to your blog today, Val. I’ve been asked quite a few times 'How did I got into writing? How did I end up book coaching and publishing? And I’ve always given the stock answers — Oh I’ve always written since I was a child, I just love all things bookish, I get to spend a lot of time reading — what’s not to love! But none of that’s the real truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth. They are all valid reasons but they’re only partial ones.
The honest truth is that writing saved my life.
At a very challenging and frightening time, I’d withdrawn, unconsciously, as far as I could from friends and family. I wasn’t myself, I could lose hours in a day as if in a parallel universe. The only safe place was sat in a far corner of a room, arms wrapped around my knees as tight as I could because it seemed to be the only way to stop myself from falling into a deep, dark hole from which I knew I’d have very little chance of escape.
To the outside world, I had all you could want, home, career, family, holidays, all the trappings of modern life. I was on the surface a leader and supporter — talented and reliable. That was until it all fell apart. They were the most terrifying times of my life.
Every day was like having an out-of-body experience, I was participating in life but not living it, I watched myself go through the motions, trying to hold things together because that’s what I always did, I was everyone else's glue. But like the little Dutch boy from the storybook trying to stop the breach of the dyke, I ran out of fingers to plug the holes appearing through actions, and inaction, of my own making, the floodwaters came and they were relentless. I know now that I was suffering from severe longtime-undiagnosed post-natal depression.
I had no one left to talk to but me, myself and I.
I’d pushed everyone else away.I cried out all the tears and that didn’t make me feel better.
One day my safe corner of choice was next to an unpacked box of books and at the top was The Artist’s Way by Julia Cameron. I don’t even recall how I came to have it.
On the cover was a quote from Elizabeth Gilbert — “The Artist’s Way brings much insight, gently helping you see what is holding you back and showing you how to move forward.”
I devoured the book which is set out in a course format over a twelve-week period. The first week was entitled “Recovering a sense of safety”, it felt like a lifeline and it demanded that I write Daily Pages, longhand writing, strictly stream of consciousness three pages every single day for the next twelve weeks.
I found a notebook and a pen and sat in my corner and wrote my first pages. It was scary at times letting the words flow. I never knew what was going to come out and some of it was very painful, hard to admit and express. Often I didn’t want to listen to the truths my mind wanted, needed, to release. But I showed up and did it and one day I didn’t feel the need to sit in the corner, so I sat at the kitchen table. Another day, I looked at what I’d written and it said: “get help”.
Eventually, I wrote about something I wanted that was in the future because, finally, I could see one ahead of me.
I’d written “I want to be a writer and help others write” and the rest, as they say, is history.
The Artist’s Way and Big Magic have been hugely positive influences, alongside Stephen King’s On Writing.
I’ve never forgotten the therapeutic power and the life-changing magic of writing and reading. Those two things saved me and gave me the tools to find myself again and forge a new path. I still write and read every day. It is essential to my well-being. If I don’t write I feel mentally and physically out of balance. It’s a fierce and forceful signal that there is something wrong, so I go back to the basics and reinforce the habit of writing my Morning Pages, even though sometimes they may be Evening Pages. For me, it’s the stream of consciousness that helps reveal what is really the problem, the thing I’m avoiding or scared about, that I’m trying to pack away in the back of my mind.
The power of words continues to inspire, comfort and entertain. Now as a published author myself, as a writing mentor and book coach to others and as a bibliotherapist, I’m using all I have learnt to support others too, sometimes through challenging periods of their lives. I’ll continue to champion increased openness on mental health-related issues and the importance of literacy for all and the written word. Because they did, quite literally, save me and can do so for others too.
And it makes me very, very happy to do so.
I’ve since, as part of my bibliotherapy training, explored many texts that can help find a way from dark places. We don’t all respond to the same approaches, The Artist’s Way and also Elizabeth Gilbert’s Big Magic were instrumental for me but may not be for you. I’d love to know what books and resources you’ve found helpful and impactful in finding your way through difficult times. Please do share in the comments.This quote sums up what I try to do for others because I know its power to change a life. And at times we all need someone to help us find the light.
I wish I could show you, when you are lonely or in darkness, the astonishing light of your own being. — HafizI’ve since gone on to self-publish and be published by Spellbound Books in my 50s, I ghostwrite books for others and was noted by the San Francisco Examiner as one of the Top book coaches to follow in 2024. Life is full of surprises and it’s never too late to follow your dreams!
The Author
I'm a wordsmith with a love of both the written and spoken word. When I don't have my head in a book or am tapping away on my laptop, I can be found either shopping at a local farmer’s market, wandering around a brocante looking for old cookware and china or chatting over a bottle of wine with friends in my adopted French homeland.
After spending over 20 years in international project and risk management I moved to the French countryside and returned to my passion for writing and books. My first short story collections were published in 2015 and 2016.
I'm currently working on more books in the Kindle short story series “Lives on a Train” the first volume of which, The 06.35 to London and the Book 2 Last Train Home, are currently available and The Caledonian Sleeper publishes soon.
My first novella series the psychological thriller “The Glass Key Trilogy” has also hit the bookshelves in both paperback and Kindle.
Book One - Where Do We Go From Here is published and Book Two - All Around The World publishes December 2021.
Second Li(v)es is my next work in progress.
An author, freelance editor, writer, book publicist and speaker, I am an incurable people watcher and a curator of interesting things and ideas with a passion for cooking, books, art and music.
When I'm not writing I run Freshly Press, a collaborative author-focused publishing consultancy.
I specialise in book coaching and manuscript development and delivery of Ethical Creative Options in publishing focusing on greener supply chains, developing high quality books using recycled paper, vegetable based inks and coatings alongside eco-friendly distribution networks.
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